Customs.

Why the HELL are Canadian Customs officers so damn mean? I have gone to a handful of other countries and they all have been super nice. That is why on my first trip to Canada over a year ago, I was shocked at the asshole behind the glass. Maybe he was just having a bad day? NOPE! Everytime I go there and back, I get treated like I have C4 strapped to my belt and a shirt that says I HATE WESTERN CULTURE! Even mor irritating? I am a 22 year girl for the USA. When was the last time a young American chick went on a rampage in Canada? And why I really like Canada...I love my home and had I not met and married a Canuck(not a hockey player...damn it) I would have NEVER settled here! I have started making up stories everytime I pass through customs. I look at it as an acting gig. Unpaid ofcourse, but a gig none the less.

Lighten up, bitches.

Kids...and why I won't have one.

For the past three months, I have been watching two 2 year olds...here are some revalations about kids...just so you know...

1) Too much is never enough. They will watch Care Bears cartoons over and over and over and over...I have been here for less than two hours and I have been subjected to Care Bears SIX times.

2) They think screaming is the answer to all problems. I won't give you a cookie? SCREAM! I won't let you jump off the roof into the grass? SCREAM? And really, how do you punish a 2 year old that you baby sit. Time out. Which never works. Cause what do they do during time out? SCREAM!

3)This is one I did ot know, but apparently they are violent. On occasion when I do not give in to their insanse requests, I have been hit and pinched...by a TWO YEAR OLD? What the crap? I mean, really? Are they watching Jerry Springer? Kids are not supposed to abuse anyone other than their siblings...I resent my abuse.

4)They drool when they sleep, like...alot. It is disgusting really.

That is all I can write for now because I am being harrased to feed them...sheesh. Who do they think they are;)

heh. In all seriousness, I adore these (and most CUTE) kids...but I will for sure wait a few years to have my own flock of crazies.

Ciao 4 Now!

The Da Vinci Code Should be Called The Stupid Ass Code

Look at a painting. Analyze it to the meaning you want to convey. Write a book. BAM. You have a best selling book of lies and distortion. Which, in my opinion, is retarded. Yes, I know the argument "But it is fiction!" Ok, let me put this situation out there...lets say some kid in your creative writing class decides to write a story about your mom(saying you like your mom...if not select a formidable replacement that you do in fact like). This is the story:

The Kid Who Sits Next to Me? Yea, His Mom is a Whore.

She was in the picture, with another man. He was wearing an Ozzy Osbourne tee...she was wearing a Polo shirt of the same color. They are having an affair! See the shape of the sunlight in the window? Looks like a penis! She is...WAS really a man! See the way that the mans hand is on his knee, in a fist? He killed her husband. Punched him out.

The End

Uhm, this is fiction. Yes, but guess what? There are some real idiots out there who believe whatever they see in print (yes, I am talking to you lady in the line at the super market feeling sorry for the lady who gave birth to a demon child) and if these people believe the lies about your mom, guess what? There goes your moms rep. Hello Legal birds out there...can we say SLANDER? Why yes we can. No matter how hard you toot the "fiction" horn...that does not matter. Cause this fiction that Dan Brown is trying to push on people...offends legions of people. Smart people. Opus Dei, Catholics, Christians, Historians and more importantly Albino's. Who cares if it is fiction? Now mindless people across the world are making there way to Louvre to see where Mary M is buried. And in the process they are bashing everything and anything Christian related that they can think of. Also, they have lost there own intelligence, which arguably, they never had.

The Da Vinci Code is a bad book and even worse movie. I will stick to Wicked, Harry Potter and the good ol Bible.

That is right. I read the Bible AND Harry Potter. That friends is a whole other blog!

From One Illegal Immigrant to Another

IN light of the recent movement created by the Illegal Aliens that infiltrate the US Boarder everyday, I feel the need to comment. Why? Well, as it stands now I am also an Illegal Alien of different sorts. I am an American in Canada waiting for my papers to go thru. By all definitions, I am illegal till that happens. Unlike those protesting in the streets of my home country, I am obeying the laws by 1) not working, 2) not demanding healthcare and 3) not participating in illegal acts of , oh I don't know...say drug trafficing? The Mexicans are sure an more arrogant race than we gave them credit for. What is the purpose of marching on the street protesting what is ILLEGAL? It is like a murder protesting jail time. Ridiculous. Also, I gurantee if a crew of Americans were to take this action in Mexico City, the Federales would waste no time in gasing us, beating us and jailing us. The fact that we have let in these illegals and alowed them to run around for so long is a disgrace. You eiether obey the rules of the country, attempt to get citezenship(as I am) or...GO HOME! If the US is so bad and not giving you illegal rights, hell go back to Mexico! The added bonus? We as a ENGLISH speaking country will now be able to order our fast food only once and not have to repeat it. Oh the glory.

Viva Los Estados Unidos! Heh.

Horror Movie Morons Deserve to Die.

This week I watch the most retarded "horror" film in the world. I am not joking. Wolf Creek is worse than the worst horror movie. All these idiot girls did was scream and cry and scream. Hi, you are trying to run away, I would suggest SHUTTING up in order for the oddly intelligent killer who magically knows where you are at all times to lose you. Or maybe, you could cause this big ordeal to end by making sure said killer is dead! A gun shot wound to the ear is not going to cause death. Neither is a gun whipping...to the lower back. Here is an IDEA. Take the knife that the killer had while he was threating your moron hyena laughing friend and stab the guy in the heart. Maybe even sevre his head to make certain he is not going to rise up and kill you. Oh, and how about not forgetting to find your other friend? You know, the one who was nice enough to buy a car and drive you across the outback free of charge? Ya, remember him? But no, none of this was even entering the girls minds as the moroniclly cavort about the outback in hopes of losing this Randy Quaid wanna be sicko. Then, as the smarter of the two locates cars to leave, she spends a massive amount of time looking at articles left behind by other victims. When she finnaly relizes that HEY! Killer might be back now! And gets in one of about 15 cars, the killer magically guessed that she would be there. Sorry idiot. You are dead. So, friend number two starts to wonder where her buddy went and like any self respecting best friend, leaves. She runs across the outback for all night and well in to the morning. Only to cause the death of a nice old man, steal his car and then drive like an idiot while being pursued by the killer, who must have imbedded her with a gps tracker, and eventulally be shot by a sniper rifle. Super. So, the only survior and rightfully so cause he is not an idiot, well, not complety, is the one they left behind. And naturallty, the killer was never found blah blah blah and still roams the outback in search of more victims to ruthlessly kill. Here is an idea...how about if this story is SO true, that the police stake out so called "Wolf Creek" and wait for the Aussie Killer and snipe him? Hmmn, guess when the movie said "Based on True Events" it was refering to the party scence in the beggining. After all, most kids that age do in fact party. Other then that, Wolf Creek was a big pile of shit. 1 hour and 44 mins of bull crap. Avoid this movie( and the Outback) at all cost.

Ah, Change.

Carolina is leaving for GCU on Sunday. I am sad! Like I see her anyways, but it is weird seeing her all grown up!

Canada was good. No, great. I think I will move there.

Nothing else to report. My life is boring as hell.

So, there ya go. Too all my readers...which total ONE...

Later

Blame Canada...

So I had a plane ticket to Vancouver booked for me today. I leave in 17 days and well, I am FREAKING OUT.

I also would like to say that Carolina NEVER posts anything here and that pisses me off...pisses me right off!

What else...huh, I wish I never cut my hair. I hate it short. I miss the long hair that I could just put up and BAM go somewhere. Oh well, right?!?

That is all. My life is boring.